{"id":67,"date":"2008-06-28T12:32:28","date_gmt":"2008-06-28T12:32:28","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.zelmastrip.com\/wordpress\/?p=67"},"modified":"2008-06-28T12:32:28","modified_gmt":"2008-06-28T12:32:28","slug":"monday-16th-june-hat-yai-and-the-visa-run-to-malaysia","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.zelmastrip.com\/wordpress\/?p=67","title":{"rendered":"Monday 16th June. Hat Yai and the visa run to Malaysia"},"content":{"rendered":"
Well I got my visa extended in the end but it was more of a fag than I<\/span>\r\nhoped.  In all fairness it could have been a lot worse but it was super<\/span>\r\nhot which didn't help.  I asked one guard why I couldn't<\/span>\r\n just go straight\r\nback into Thailand having got my exit stamp and he<\/span>\r\n replied that I had to\r\ngo to Malaysia first as, "It's the law!" so I<\/span>\r\n obliged.  It means I have\r\nMalaysian stamps in my passport though, even<\/span>\r\n if the entrance and exit stamp\r\ndo show the same date!<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\nThe journey to the border was actually really amusing as my<\/span>\r\n driver spoke\r\nabout as much English as I do Thai.  He showed me a phrase<\/span>\r\n book he had which\r\nwas unhelpful for me as it had things for drivers<\/span>\r\n written in English and then\r\nthe translations in Thai and not English<\/span>\r\n characters.  I did nearly wet myself\r\nthough reading the things that you<\/span>\r\n obviously need to know as a Thai chauffeur.\r\nI would have written more<\/span>\r\n down but he looked very confused and I was trying to hide my<\/span>\r\namusement...here are a few:<\/span>\r\n\r\n"We are running out of petrol"<\/span>\r\n\r\nA VERY common occurence I can see the use of pointing this out to the<\/span>\r\ndriver.<\/span>\r\n\r\n"Some drivers are drunk or use amphetamine".<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n\r\nNow what do you think the likelihood of seeing that one in an English<\/span>\r\nphrasebook for drivers is?  The book was really thin as well which makes<\/span>\r\nit even more worrying.  There was also a note later which was<\/span>\r\n obviously\r\ndirected towards the chauffeur which said something along the<\/span>\r\nlines of, "When you are drunk and drive it worries me".<\/span>\r\n\r\nI liked this one:<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n\r\n"Sir, I need the money for the extension of licence plate tax and first<\/span>\r\nclass insurance, they will expire next week simultaneously.  If we<\/span>\r\ndon't renew them, we'll certainly face a heavy fine."<\/span>\r\n\r\nYes you would but how nicely you phrase it!<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n\r\nThis one I really should learn:<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n\r\n"I think we are getting lost why don't you ask a traffic police (sic)".<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n\r\nI -dare- anyone to say the following:<\/span>\r\n\r\n"Please tell him not to smoke in my car.  I'm suffocating to death."<\/span>\r\n\r\nAt this point I was seriously struggling to control my giggles and had<\/span>\r\ntears running down my face.  My driver looked -very- confused.<\/span>\r\n\r\nAnother one which is phrased well but again would be used -so- much out<\/span>\r\n here:<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n\r\n"Don't drive zig zag like this, I'm getting a headache.  I don't mind<\/span>\r\nif we're a bit late."<\/span>\r\n\r\nTrue but bless:<\/span>\r\n\r\n"Now Bangkok is notorious for traffic jams and I am very sad about<\/span>\r\n this."<\/span>\r\n\r\nAnother beautifully Engish thing to say:<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n\r\n"Frankly speaking, I don't like the way you drive.  Please change your<\/span>\r\ndriving habits".<\/span>\r\n\r\nHonestly the whole book was gold dust.  I should have offered to buy it<\/span>\r\nfrom him but he was already quite confused and looked slightly upset<\/span>\r\nat me noting things down.  If only the Thai translations were in an<\/span>\r\nEnglish<\/span>\r\n character set.  I mean can you imagine being able to say those things to<\/span>\r\nthe guy driving you?  Unfortunately there weren't sayings for the<\/span>\r\nthings I would regularly like to be able to say to Thai drivers like:<\/span>\r\n\r\n"This bus stinks of poo."\r\n\r\n<\/span>\r\n"Please turn the Thai Karaoke down, or preferably off, otherwise I may<\/span>\r\ninitiate a massacre on your lovely vehicle".\r\n\r\n"We're all going to die."<\/span>\r\n\r\n"AAaaargh, I nearly died."<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n<\/span>\r\n\r\nOh and...\r\n\r\n"Will you kindly stop telling me you love me\/ want boom boom\/<\/span>\r\nhow beautiful I am and remove your hand from my leg otherwise <\/span>\r\nyou\r\nmay get a slightly different response to the one you so clearly want.<\/span>\r\n".\r\n\r\nAfter the somewhat entertaining visa run I went back to my glorious abode,\r\nhad some dinner and engaged in a bit more retail therapy.  Well, when in Thailand,\r\ndo as the Malaysians do, as they say!<\/span><\/pre>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Well I got my visa extended in the end but it was more of a fag than I hoped. In all fairness it could have been a lot worse but it was super hot which didn’t help. I asked one guard why I couldn’t just go straight back into Thailand having got my exit stamp […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[1],"tags":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zelmastrip.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/67"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zelmastrip.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zelmastrip.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zelmastrip.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zelmastrip.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=67"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.zelmastrip.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/67\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.zelmastrip.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=67"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zelmastrip.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=67"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.zelmastrip.com\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=67"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}